Phases: Music and a Friend

So every year, I go through phases of music where I only listen to one artist and then move on. Currently, I'm in my Blink-182/Reggie and the Full Effect phase. Both bands I listened to in 5th grade with a friend that I no longer friends with. I often miss that friend, we grew up together. I listen to the songs as a mourning in a sense of this person and even if the song is something as positive as "Aliens Exhist" by Blink, I still get upset. This friend will probably haunt me for the rest of my life because of how much of an impact he had on me. I started music because of him, and much like him, I don't take it too seriously, we both even went through times in our lives where we went on a break from music (at different times).

We eventually grew apart completely. He left our group of friends and became friends with cooler people, they aren't assholes, they're just cooler. He's with a whole new group while me and my friends talk about how everyone who was originally in our circle of friends seems to have gone away thus leaving only 5 people left out of 12 that still are as close as they were in 7th grade. I suppose their leaving seperated friends from people taking up space, but it still hurts.

It probably hurts more because I know that my old friend has moved on and doesn't seem to care about me anymore. I think that hurts that most. But I'll never stop hoping he doesn't turn back into his old-self and give me a call. There will always be hope. Without hope, I'd have moved on by now.